Tuesday, November 23, 2010

Here's what I learned about New York.

 New Yorkers really, really like to have long, in depth conversations about the best way to get from point A to point B. Whether it's by car or train, subway or street, they can talk for hours about the best routes to take to avoid traffic, reduce tolls and fares, and avoid the police.

They all think they know the best way, but they want to know which way you would go, so they can tell you why you're wrong.


  1. I supect that need for navigation has something to do with feeling out of control in an environment so huge. I guess that's the price to pay for living in such an amazing place.

  2. I've got mad evasive maneuvers when police are involved. I may or may not resemble the rest of that statement, even if I live in Dirty Jersey.

  3. Here's what I've learned about Minnesota drivers:

    Minnesotans are extremely repressed. They are as subject to anger as anyone else, but they push it way down low into themselves somewhere where it gets hotter and more fit to burst. When it does you get rage, but Minnesotans will not express rage in any full-on face-to-face manner but rather only in environments where they are protected.... like behind a windshield.

    Frequently I've been flipped off or honked at by a red- and contorted-faced person shouting silently behind the glass, sometimes using hand gestures. When you pull up next to this person at a light however, they inch the car back so they don't have to look at you and if you do get next to them do the looking-straight-ahead thing.

    Perhaps Elly will agree --- we bridge-and-tunnelers may be angry hooligans, but at least you know where we stand? Or where we drive for that matter.

  4. I've never driven in Minnisota but all that misdirected rage sounds invigorating!
    Throgsneck or Whitestone? That used to be the big debate for us.
    Then my parents would hurl something into the backseat and threaten to drive off the bridge and provide us with a solution to the noise.
    To this day I am terrified of any and all bridges.

  5. p.s. Elly's got a born and bred kind of knowlegde about the best ways to get in and out which I saw firsthand this August. As far as I'm concerned she's a New Yorker even if she was born below the Mason Dixon line.


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